TroubleZone.Net

Did you ever hear what I told you?
Did you ever read what I wrote you?
Did you ever listen to what we played?
Did you ever let in what the world said?
Did we get this far just to feel your hate?
Did we play to become only pawns in the game?
How blind can you be, don’t you see:
You chose the long road, but we’ll be waiting..⁰¹

Well, this time neither DragonForce nor HammerFall lyrics, but again one from Nightwish.. The reason is simple: up to now, this track spins about 80% of the time I’m running Winamp..
Though, there are indeed special things going on in my personal “real life”, so I thought that I could use “unusual” lyrics/artists once again..

As the day is drawing to a close, this post needs to be done a little bit faster than I usually do posts here.. So, let’s make the story not too big and let’s get down to business:

About a week ago, I finally signed up my employment contract with a company operating in the integrated store processes-sector.. The signing itself was quite “strange” as my hand which held the Biro was a little bit shaking, but that might be due to several dreams coming true:

• Getting a job after two years at a technical college full of stubborn and arrogant teachers is just amazing — especially, when the employment contract is open-ended!


• Doing a job which is almost exactly what you expected your job would be like is nearly unbelievable..


• Earning enough money to pay the bill(s) and still having some money that you can save for your “next big dream”⁰² gives me a feeling I can hardly describe — it’s just overwhelming!


• The workmates seem to be really great⁰³!


• The company absolutely believes in the idea that only satisfied employees are employees who put 100% of their effort into their job and therefore offer a great work climate — YEEEEES!!

I also met a new friend.. Christin is her name.. No guys, it’s _not_ that type of “friend”, she’s more like a sister to me than a girlfriend..

And yes, the smilies will be changed back to Nomicons soon!

Uh, quite a “rough” post this time.. But I’ve got to go and get some sleep⁰⁴..

Take care,
Martin..

1. Nightwish — Bye, Bye, Beautiful [↩]
2. Just use Google to get some pics of VW’s “IROC”.. [↩]
3. Especially the female ones.. [↩]
4. I had only 8 hours in the last 48 hours.. [↩]

.. and their ever staring eyes
Now is the time to defend your ground
Destiny will call, to remind us all
Now fly free, so far from here
This life we know will end
In dreams of everlasting pain
The fallen now rise again⁰¹

As this blog is all about a life’s trouble, I want to pour out my woes to the world this time..

So, let’s get things right: my life sucked.. It wasn’t completely worthless since my mates were always around, keeping me alive by providing kinda “life support”, words of advice and stuff like that.. And they’re also always the ones I can count on whenever life comes in with another hit right into my face..

But honestly, I don’t want to complain about all those troubles⁰²) as it simply wouldn’t help.. And so, I just keep asking myself “Who the fuck feels so pissed off that I get knocked down again — just one second after I regain my feet?” Because every single way towards the finish line is full of obstacles somebody put in my way⁰³..

I really don’t know where my life’s going to⁰⁴), but I’m still hoping that things will be better — _soon_!

Though, I’m facing a typical German proverb right now: being right doesn’t necessarily mean that you are in the right⁰⁵! — Or as a long story:

Read the rest of this entry »

1. DragonForce — The Flame Of Youth [↩]
2. Hey, I _am_ right here, in the center of the TroubleZone! ; [↩]
3. No, I won’t give up — it simply doesn’t exist within my vocabulary! [↩]
4. Does anyone know this? ; [↩]
5. I couldn’t find a “correct” equivalent idiom for this, so I tried my best to “built” one.. [↩]

This is how I feel⁰¹:

I… I am the one
The one… Who lost control
Control… But in the end I’d be the
Last man standing

I… I am the one
The one… Who sold his soul
His soul… Forever gone to be the
Last man standing tall

Glorious, noble in my mind
Everything — a fight to win
Taking all and giving
Whatever my pride would let me
Not backing down, not giving in
I wouldn’t lose, I couldn’t

[Chorus]

I walk alone
With my head held high
Never felt that I belong
Stand my ground at all costs
Running through life with blindfolds
Just for the right, right to be wrong

Nothing would rule my world but…

[Chorus]

[Solo — Stefan Elmgren]

Nothing would rule my world but…

[Chorus — 2x]

Seeing clearer what I’ve done
I’d refuse to let things go
I could never once admit I’m wrong
And what do I had to show?

Seeing clearer what’s at stake
And the things I have to change
I just hope I can, it’s not too late
To get a chance to end this pain

1. There’s not more to come for personal reasons this time, sorry.. [↩]

.. and you stood the count to ten
Came back to harvest glory, now your star will shine again⁰¹..

Guys, this is a very, very special post for me.. Not only because I’m going to release the most recent update for Firefox V2 within the next 2 weeks, but also because of something I thought it won’t ever happen to me..

I know that we’re all hoping for this moment to come and that most of us will get to this point one day.. But I travelled on earth for about 5 years, went through hell like walking an endless road and life tormented me mercilessly..
Of course, I always got my friends around, helping me up⁰².. But if you get knocked down again and again, you might reach the point where life isn’t life anymore, but a cycle of situations you want to escape from.. — The only problem: you just can’t break out of that loop.. It just keeps you inside, because you’ve lost too much power and then, the burden of years got just too big⁰³..

So, what should you do? What would you do? Trying to break out of that loop again and again? — Easier said than done, guys.. Trust me, I tried.. Oh yes, I really did.. But I couldn’t get what I wanted — and I didn’t wanted to get what I could..
But then everything turned into what you all have seen on TV.. I found myself in a new perspective, much, much better and within some days, everything changed dramatically.. I felt the power again.. I felt the strength again.. — I felt love again!

Ironically, we all have butterflies in our stomach when we fall in love — but this time, things were⁰⁴ different, because instead I felt a pleasant feeling of warmth within my heart and also within my soul.. And every single day, I gain more and more power from this feeling, but also the “hunger” for her increases day by day..
Lydi⁰⁵ is this angel⁰⁶ normally called and she’s like the blood within my veins — I can feel it pulsing through me and without it, I just couldn’t live without..

The craziest thing about our love is actually the fact that this time, it wasn’t me who talked to a girl, but a girl who talked to me.. So, the odds are in our favour, I guess..
All that said, I’m in a mood, where others might call me “stoned” or say that I’m “hopeless” — none of that is true! But how would you feel after your most fervent wish came true?


Take care & all the best,
Martin..

1. HammerFall — yet again, this time it’s “The Fire Burns Forever” [↩]
2. A very, very huge “Thanks!” goes out to Axel Hartwig, Nico Seiberth and Sebastian Wienhold — ordered by their last name alphabetically ! [↩]
3. Feels a bit like described by Sonata Arctica within their song “8th Commandment” [↩]
4. And are! [↩]
5. Actually, Lydia is her real name, but I prefer the shorter one.. [↩]
6. Who has her 21^st birthday soon.. :D [↩]

.. the truth that lied beyond my inner dreams⁰¹

Guys, this is a very special post for me.. Not only because I’m announcing Firefox V2 2.5 to arrive within this (or the next) month, but mostly because I did some things I’d normally never ever do..
But times are changing and so I thought that I could try it, although I almost knew that it would be impossible⁰² — so here it is:



I know that it’s not that “uga-aga-boom-mega-afterburner”⁰³ type of an image — but come on, it looks awesome and rocks, right?


Lastly, I’d like to state that version 2.5 of Firefox V2 will be the last one of the 2.x series and that I’m going to do brand new graphics for Firefox V3!


Take care,
Martin..

1. Oh, I love HammerFall’s “The Unforgiving Blade” just so much.. :D [↩]
2. That makes the feeling even better! [↩]
3. Man, that word is crazy.. :D [↩]