TroubleZone.Net

So, long time, no read, huh?
Well, there has been _a lot_ of trouble in my life1, but also one of the highest heights a man can achieve! Though, let’s do this step by step:

Since my last post on February 1st, 2009 the first “main event” that occurred was Eleanor2, finally arriving at my local dealer..
Guys, although almost nine months have passed since then, I still can’t find probable words to describe how much I kinda love “her”..
I mean, there were so many people in my past, especially back in school/at the college, who claimed and predicted that I would end up as a loser.. But I didn’t listen to ’em and instead fought as hard as I could and in the end, this car proved and still proves ’em all wrong!
You know, washing Eleanor for the very first time was an intense feeling — maybe a bit like polishing that old trophy in your showcase that makes you so proud..

So, I began modifying Eleanor in order to give her what _every_ girl in the world wants to be: just a “special and unique” touch..
That said, there’s a trunk tray3, entrance bars4 were also mounted..
Also, the default plastic gear shift was replaced with the massive aluminum-part from the GTI “Edition 30”.
The glovebox’ handle was exchanged in favor of an aluminum-looking one and then there’s an alteration for the stacker in front of the gearshift — up to some days after my guide was released, there was not a single Scirocco out there, having this modification which makes me kinda proud..

To get a better impression on how it actually looks, please visit the follow link which is a guide written by myself for doing the modification on your own: www.motor-talk.de/blogs/schwer-zu-widerstehen/volkswagen-viva-la-revoluci-n-t2249270.html

Unfortunately, the guide is all German — but since I took _lots_ of photos, it should already be enough to do the modification.. If not, just drop me a line or a comment to this post..
For those of you which are curious: the listed parts will fit _any_ Golf V (called “Rabbit V” in the USA, AFAIK) and all VW models based on its platform, e.g. Eos..
Though, it will set you back at about 40 to 120 Euros, depending on which parts you might already have and/or want..

Anyway, enough about Eleanor for this post — let’s move on to the next one, my (ex-) job..

On March 26th, 2009, I finally set myself into my new car and the next day5, I drove to my employer at an unusual time: 05:30 in the morning!
Yes, I was totally out of my mind, but have you _ever_ driven your car at that time of the day? If not, I suggest you to try it, because it’s just awesome! All that silence and all that very fresh air.. Absolutely amazing!
Now, the main reason was actually different: I just wanted to make sure that I could pull into a spot with enough space and that those of my colleagues who shared the “thrill” with me could easily notice the car when they arrived..

About 8 hours later, my work for that week was done and the weekend was calling — a call I easily followed without any question..

It was the following Monday, when my head of department came into the test-lab, talked to me and requested my attendance at a meeting between him, the staff manager and myself a couple of minutes later..
Right after he finished his sentence, I felt thunderstruck.. Although I didn’t know why they wanted to have a talk with me, I knew that it wasn’t a good sign and that my job was at stake..

About 30 minutes later, I heard the staff manager saying those words that caused my eyes to turn black and my ears to go (almost) deaf.. Honestly, I could neither see him properly nor hear what he was saying and almost keel over and fell from the chair..

Now, I know there’s/was this “global economy crisis” as they call it and that it costs some jobs..
Also, going on with blaming my ex-employer and all that stuff would be an option, because I’ve got a legal expenses insurance in case they would sue me for publishing details of my lay-off.. But I won’t!
“Why?”, you’re asking? Because it’s not my style to let out all my frustration on them — the fact that some of my ex-colleagues quit at their own request just some days/weeks afterwards should speak for itself..

And there’s also that one motto, I’m living true to and which was coined by Jedi Master Yoda: “Do… or do not. There is no try.” — though, I broke with that habit a couple of days ago..
I never wrote about it, but my last relationship didn’t go that well and so I followed the path of being a single — at least, I thought so..

Because after struggling with the “hunt” for a new job6, I finally found one in Lower Saxony..
And with the new job, a new girl came into my life — but this time, she didn’t fit into my normal “scheme”: she’s was older7 and even more interestingly, she shared an _unbelievable_ mount of point of views regarding several important things in life with me!
In addition, she took that little boy8 to a _whole_ new level, to the man I am starting to be..

There’s just not enough time and space to even try to describe all the feelings, the knowledge and the warmth Anne9 she gave me within the past three months we’re with each other.. And for all this, I truly and unconditionally love her — from the deepest depth of my soul.

Now, most people would think of my life as being “just fine” up to now, but no: since exactly four days, we broke up — err, no, _she_ broke up!
Reasons? My faults: probably being too understanding10 and I didn’t bear in mind that Anne might not be as fast as I am when it comes to getting used to somebody and include him/her into your own life.

Of course, I feel like my heart got ripped out in the blink of an eye, but I won’t blame her for choosing the way she did.
And I also won’t quit and go back to Saxony, even if this means that I see her beautiful face11 each day again and again and again.
Why? Because I am not a human being who quits — others do this, not me.

Sure, I (will) cry. Sure, I fell. But here I am, rebound and still following life’s path until I maybe fall again — and, of course, rebound just once more.

If you want to know where such a fool like me gets his energy and strength from for living this way, the answer is pretty simple.. Well, I make no secret of it: music! Plain as that, just music!
If you like to listen to an example, here it is: www.youtube.com/watch?v=vL6HmY8EbtA (Especially that a-cappella-part at the end..)

Now, that song doesn’t include this blog post’s title in its lyrics.. So, to keep to my old “tradition”, the title for this post comes straight from the awesome pianist called Yiruma and you can listen to it over here: www.youtube.com/watch?v=8Xms7l8il0A

Just like Ludwig van Beethoven once did12, Yiruma doesn’t need lyrics to express his feelings and thoughts with his music — but for those of you who want lyrics, he also wrote a version which has lyrics13: www.youtube.com/watch?v=TIdBiV1UDDM

All that said, have a good night, a happy Saint Nicholas’ Day and bye for now,
Martin

1. What a coincidence, considering my blog’s domain-name! [↩]
2. That’s the name I gave _her_ after watching “Gone in 60 Seconds (2000 film)” approximately the fifth time.. [↩]
3. Which is both, gas- and oil-resistant! [↩]
4. Of course, both feature a “Scirocco” lettering which makes each entrance into Eleanor a pretty cool, but also kinda classy, moment! [↩]
5. Which was actually a Friday, but not Friday, the 13^th! [↩]
6. Which at first seemed to be successful, but then turned into a three months run without money to pay the rent.. [↩]
7. About half a year, to be precise.. [↩]
8. Who knew his little world, but not the big one.. [↩]
9. Yes, that’s her beautiful name.. [↩]
10. Don’t get this wrong: after consulting many people, it turns out that most girls want an understanding guy, but also his cold shoulder at the same time.. [↩]
11. With these deep green-brown eyes which make me mesmerized.. [↩]
12. Excluding his great “Ode To ‘To Joy’”.. [↩]
13. Only the chorus is English and the rest remains Korean, but you can switch on English subtitles.. [↩]

.. and their ever staring eyes
Now is the time to defend your ground
Destiny will call, to remind us all
Now fly free, so far from here
This life we know will end
In dreams of everlasting pain
The fallen now rise again1

As this blog is all about a life’s trouble, I want to pour out my woes to the world this time..

So, let’s get things right: my life sucked.. It wasn’t completely worthless since my mates were always around, keeping me alive by providing kinda “life support”, words of advice and stuff like that.. And they’re also always the ones I can count on whenever life comes in with another hit right into my face..

But honestly, I don’t want to complain about all those troubles2) as it simply wouldn’t help.. And so, I just keep asking myself “Who the fuck feels so pissed off that I get knocked down again — just one second after I regain my feet?” Because every single way towards the finish line is full of obstacles somebody put in my way3..

I really don’t know where my life’s going to4), but I’m still hoping that things will be better — _soon_!

Though, I’m facing a typical German proverb right now: being right doesn’t necessarily mean that you are in the right5! — Or as a long story:

Read the rest of this entry »

1. DragonForce — The Flame Of Youth [↩]
2. Hey, I _am_ right here, in the center of the TroubleZone! ; [↩]
3. No, I won’t give up — it simply doesn’t exist within my vocabulary! [↩]
4. Does anyone know this? ; [↩]
5. I couldn’t find a “correct” equivalent idiom for this, so I tried my best to “built” one.. [↩]